Zombie Lake

movie reviews

You’d think that a movie featuring Nazi zombies would be worth watching, but you’d be wrong. This 1980 French snoozefest tells the story of a lake infested with four or five really persistent zombies. Why are they zombies and not just German corpses? No clue. All I know is that when you dump a body into a French lake, it will reanimate forty years later with green paint on its face.

These zombies are unique in that they are very choosy about their victims. They will only eat fully nude young women (with a clear preference for volleyball players) who venture into their murky pond. Of course, it serves them right, as any woman willing to drop her skivvies to jump into that stagnant green slop is asking, bare minimum, for an infection of some sort. It demonstrates really bad judgement. They’re almost begging those Nazis to rub their weird green faces on their necks until the poor gals’ throats start to bleed. It looks uncomfortable enough to be horrifying.

I advise skipping this one. You don’t see a lot of French VHS transfers these days, but still. It barely even counts as a zombie movie. Watch Dead Snow instead.

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